35 Weeks - Birth Education - Labor Plans

Ok ok so I know it's been forever since I've posted - it's been a little crazy around here!  LOL & I'll apologize now... it's gonna be a lengthy one.

Today marks the beginning of 35 weeks :o) It still seems so crazy to me that in less than 2 months there will be another human being who is complete dependent on me living in my household!  And don't even get me started on Mother's and Father's Day taking on a completely different meaning this year!  It's just craziness ~ but - amazingly cool craziness :o)  In another week we'll get to see the peanut one more time in-utero before the big day arrives - I'm not sure if they'll do another 3D/4D ultrasound or just the 2D to check measurements etc... either way Jason and I are totally geeked.  We've both invited our moms to come along as well - they were both so impressed by how far the technology has come since they last encountered it and we thought it'd be a cool thing to be able to share with them. :o) So that will be one full ultrasound room! LOL

Of course I'll also see one of the Dr.'s that day as well - where I hope to be able to discuss in more detail how I envision my labor going (even though I know often these things have a life of their own... literally).  But before I get to that... Jason and I have been attending Birth Education classes, and wow - so useful!  Our homework after the first week for the second week was to bring 3 tennis balls and a sock - so our partners could learn how to use them for different massage techniques.... AMAZING.  LOL We also learn obviously about the way labor should go and how it CAN go (two totally different things). Although I was pretty ok with just relying on a song and a prayer that my body would get me through the process some way somehow - I really think it's been good for Jason to feel like he's learning things that could be productive in what is typically the type of situation where he'll lack any control over anything (we all know how much men LOVE feeling useless and unproductive).  Our "teacher" - who is an RN, Lamaze instructor, and registered Doula - is a wealth of knowledge, and is neither pro or con medical intervention, but instead, pro informed-choice. 

So back to that "birth plan."  I've screwed up enough in my life to know that things RARELY go according to plans... but I've also "gotten back on the horse" enough times to know that it's always good to have a best-case-scenario to refer back to.   There were a sequence of events that I encountered before I became pregnant that already had me questioning whether or not the MDs in my OB/GYNs office were treating me as a whole, instead of as just a bunch of symptoms - so it was a natural progression for me to just continue my research into the subject once I started pre-natal care with them.  Early on in my pregnancy I knew I'd probably be happier in the care of a midwifery practice, but circumstances such as my husband living out of state and major home renovations prevented me from devoting the needed time to finding such a practice and transferring medical care to one.  I knew as D-Day drew closer, I'd have to prepare myself to become my own advocate.  It's not that my doctors aren't good doctors... in fact they're exactly that... in a practice that sees hundreds of patients, many of whom require much more medical intervention in their pregnancies than my decidedly routine one.  In the office, to the nurses and doctors, I feel simply like a number - and a boring one at that.

Let me put a disclaimer out here at this point that I do not believe they have provided me or my baby with inadequate medical care, just that within the practice, I'm just a file.  I'm lucky if I get to see the same doctor from appointment to appointment, even luckier for them to remember any defining details about my personal life, and many times I have to correct them as they try to glean information from my appointment history sheet.  It's a doctors office, and comes with all the good and bad things that encompasses.

I compiled information in as many ways as I know how regarding how a "typical" labor looks in America in the 21st Century.  I watched documentaries, read books, googled, talked to mom's who have delivered with and without medical intervention along many points of that spectrum with varying backgrounds, I even sought out a childhood friend who will soon be beginning her residency as an Obstetrician.  At this point, I'll put out another disclaimer.  I think every woman has the right (and hopefully the opportunity) to bring their child into this world in exactly the manner they wish.  If pain's not their thing - there are certainly ways to ensure they feel as little as possible.  If they are more comfortable giving birth while their doctor is on-call and their labor hasn't progressed to a point where they think that will happen without intervention, there are things that can be done to ensure their trusted physician is present to deliver their child sooner rather than later.  And if they want to try and do things the way they've been done for milleniums - I believe that decision should be both an option and supported by the practitioners of western medicine.  It should be HER choice.  Period.

You can probably see where I'm going with this, as I've come to have some very definitive wishes about how I'd like my labor to go.  I've come to have them after much research done entirely on my own (my doctors have actually yet to bring up labor or delivery during any appointment), and they are of course all held with hope and prayer that I have a "routine" labor and delivery.  After getting some input from my friend in OB residency, I understand better the parameters they use to make medical interventions in delivery, and will of course take into consideration every recommendation that comes from my doctor's mouth as I go through labor and delivery.

That being said, these are my general wishes:  I want to do it as naturally as possible.  I'd like to labor at home for as long as possible... probably longer than doctors usually recommend based on the fact that I've had about the most boring and routine pregnancy up until now and I live literally 5 minutes door-to-door from the hospital.  I don't wish to have any induction or augmentation procedures performed unless I'm significantly past my due date and the health of my baby is in question.  At the top of this list is pitocin... I'd like to avoid it's use literally at almost all costs.  Once in the hospital, I don't want the nurses offering me any medical pain management options.  I'm fully aware of the options available and I can guarantee if Jason and I come to the decision that I can no longer cope in a healthy way with labor... I will ask.  I'd prefer to not have continuous internal fetal monitoring unless of course the external monitoring warrants more information be gathered.  I'd prefer not to have an IV for as long as possible so I can be as mobile as possible.  I'd prefer to be allowed to choose the position I give birth in, based on what feels the most natural to me, what will provide me the largest chance of not tearing or needing an episiotomy, and of course what's in the best interest of my baby.  I wish to be consulted before any medical interventions are performed, and hopefully the opportunity to discuss alternative options with a doctor if the need arises.  I want my baby placed on my stomach/chest directly after being delivered as long as it's health isn't in question.  I'd like the routine tests to wait an hour or so, so my baby has a chance to breastfeed for the first time while it's the most alert (generally an hour or little more after birth).

So that's it.  Call me a granola-head... I want to experience my baby's birth, the good, the bad, and (hopefully not too much of this) the ugly.  Pain doesn't necessarily scare me.  I've run sprints until I've thrown up and my leg muscles literally give out on me.  I've performed things for the first time in competition, that I was previously unable to perform in practice, I assume simply due to escalated adrenaline and focus that goes hand-in-hand with those intense situations.  I've continued to compete after becoming injured.  I know none of these things - even all done in the same day - come close to what labor and delivery will be like.  But I believe my body has performed in ways that were unexpected and extraordinary before... and I'm counting on its ability to be able to do that again.

And if Jason passes out... this may all be out the window... LOL

Wish me luck!!! :o)

~ erin

P.S. & in the event that I go to the hospital and I have an epidural or any of the other medical interventions that are available these days - I will NOT beat myself up.  I trust that both me and my husband will make the best decisions possible for our baby at the point in time we're asked to make those  choices.  That is all we can ask of ourselves.